Love? Will I Find You, Or Will You Find Me?

I've been thinking about love a lot lately. My friend (no name shall be said) has been discussing his or her feelings with me about someone for awhile. This has got me thinking about my love life. I have met three people in my short 18 years that I truly love. Now I am not in love with these people, but I don't think I could live without these people after having met them. They are of both genders and share many of my interests. This is just one of the kinds of love I am searching for. I have found it, and now do to external influences I want to search for the other kind. Now, I have had little luck in finding my soulmate. I believe there is someone who is me in woman form. I also have little luck dating the possible candidates because I often pick taken women. I feel this pressure to find someone because of society. I feel this pressure to just date someone and have sex with someone I have no strong feelings for. I was once asked if I was a virgin by choice or by chance. I am a virgin by choice, but I will not save myself for marriage. If I find that person who makes me whole, I will make love to them as much as possible. A lot of my friends see me and sex as impossible because I have what seems as a very conservative attitude toward it. I just don't have the libido of all the sex-crazed teen shows on television nowadays. I was told sex with me would be like raping a puppy because I seem so innocent. Not to sound too nerdy, but I researched sex. People act like sex is something perverse to me. It's not. Not to sound cheesy or lame, but I prefer to make love not have sex. People look at me like I'm not normal, but I never have been normal and being normal is never a good thing. Normal people have to have some of the most boring lives. They probably never think about things like this and just go about living their "normal" lives. I prefer to live my "weird" life, listening to deep love songs that make me want to find that person that I can: just lay next to and know everything is right, tell everything to, follow into the dark, not care what she looks like in the morning, have fun doing absolutely nothing with, and spend the rest of my life with.